Ways Masturbation Can Improve Your Sex Life
For years it was a widely-known fact that guys enjoy frequent self-pleasure, but it’s only recently come out that us girls enjoy the same solo play too. Apart from the obvious, there are lots of ways masturbation can improve your sex life.
From discovering your own hotspots (and sharing them with your mate) to lasting longer in the sack, self-fondling can be incredibly self-rewarding, not to mention fantastic for your other half. Do it alone behind closed doors or out in the open in front of your wife – both ways are satisfying, sexy and healthy. So here are some ways masturbation can improve your sex life.
Self-exploration
Nothing is more gratifying than learning more about your own body and what makes you tick. It’s a common and beneficial way to figure out what it is you do like (and maybe what you don’t like). This form of self-discovery will make everything from foreplay to sex that much more enjoyable.
Just make sure you pass this learned info on to your spouse – sure, it’s great to get yourself off but it will be ten times more passionate if you tell your wife what to do (and she does it, and you have a mind-blowing orgasm…)
Last longer
Very often, guys who masturbate frequently are able to maintain their erections and delay ejaculation for a longer period of time. This goes back to my first point – when you masturbate on a regular basis, you learn about your body and you become more in-tune with your biological reactions. Once you really familiarize yourself with the sensations that occur during sex, you can actually teach yourself how to hold off – you’ll start to recognize the triggers and you can then find new ways to fend off your impulses and hence, last longer.
I was dating this guy for a few months who could go forever in bed (the anti-minute-man). But, as we started spending “everyday” time together, we also started to learn more about each other… and it didn’t take me long to figure out that in addition to shaving and washing in the shower every morning, he was also choking the monkey. And let me tell you – to this day he was the only guy I was ever intimate with who had complete control of his load – it made oral and conventional sex fantastic!
Keep the balance
It’s rare for people who have been in long-term relationships to always be “in the mood” at the same time – maybe you’d be happy with sex five times a week but she’s only interested in it once or twice. Well, masturbation can be a great “filler” for those dry spells. Keep yourself satisfied (and balanced) by taking things into your own hands (literally). You don’t always need her and she doesn’t always need you.
Two-sided
While women and masturbating is a topic that isn’t as faux pas as it once was, there are still a lot of ladies who feel embarrassment, shame, or even humility when it comes to openly discussing their self-pleasuring. So let your partner know that you’re not only okay with it but encourage her to explore and share her findings as well.
Yours forever,
Gabrielle Moore
P.S. DON’T FORGET TO LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS BELOW! (If you’re shy, feel free to use a nickname)
Vibrator Techniques
““The best sex I have ever had was with my vibrator.” – Eva Longoria Parker
Some say diamonds are a girl’s best friend… others say it’s the vibrator. And having owned my fair share of gyrating toys, I can tell you that they really can be a major turn-on, which is why every man should know how to properly use one on a woman. The wrong technique can make a pleasurable sensation immediately uncomfortable. It’s also important to know how to use the right combination of moves in order to maximize excitement. Trust me – practice makes perfect, and I know all the ins and outs to using a vibrator (pun intended).
Back and forth
The best tried-and-true vibrator technique: the back-and-forth groove. It will get her juices flowing and everything down there stimulated. I’ve been known to have actual orgasms from this simple movement (going at it solo and with a mate). Start slowly and then speed things up. Vary your speeds according to her reactions (some like it slow, others like it fast). Use the tip of the toy as well as glide the shaft of the tool up and down her entire lower area.
Circular motions
Go from a straight back-and-forth vibrator technique to making circles. Use the tip of the toy to trace circles near the top of her nether regions and then slowly make your way down to her vagina (and then stop there – any contact with her anus or surrounding areas could pass germs on to the vibrator). Again, don’t be afraid to experiment with soft, slow patterns and then quicker circles.
The infamous Figure 8
I’ve talked about this technique when it comes to fingering a woman, and I get into the endless benefits of the Figure 8 in my book on foreplay – and it shouldn’t be overlooked when playing with a vibrator either. The titillating sensation of swirling the toy around her clitoris as well as her vagina will have her begging you for more. As you’re exploring, stop on any “hotspots” that seem to get her overly excited.
A little teasing
Resist the urge (and her begging) and don’t insert the vibrator right away. Although we really want it, the art of building momentum is even more stimulating, and when you do finally penetrate her (with the toy or your throbbing manhood), her screams will crack glass. Let the tip of the vibrator hover over the opening of her vagina. Keep things heightened by adding a few back and forth movements or that fabulous Figure 8 and then bring the toy back to her vagina. I promise – her toes will curl!
Slow insertion
Once you finally decide to put the vibrator inside of her, use very slow, gentle movements. Because some vibrators are made of a solid material, don’t yank the toy up – it will hit her pelvic bone and be an instant buzz-kill.
Switching things up
Play with a variety of the aforementioned vibrator techniques to achieve maximum pleasure with this gizmo – start with circular motions that gradually make their way to her vagina, insert it slowly only to withdraw and return to the circular movements. After all, vibrators are a toy – you should have fun with them!
Much love,
Gabrielle Moore
P.S. DON’T FORGET TO LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS BELOW! (If you’re shy, feel free to use a nickname)
The Game Of Domination
“Woman is the dominant sex. Men have to do all sorts of stuff to prove that they are worthy of woman’s attention.” – Camille Paglia
Domination can have a lot of meanings when it comes to game-play in the bedroom – it can be everything from blindfolding your partner to breaking out the whips, chains, and ball-gags. Almost all of my female friends agree (including moi): nothing is more of a turn-on than being dominated. It’s a primal urge that all of us seek to fulfill at some point in our sex lives, and when you’re involved with someone where trust is involved, it can be extremely exciting and satisfying.
Don’t take a woman home for a one-night stand and think you can get away with handcuffing her – trust me, she’ll be dialing “911″ faster than you can do up your pants! The game of domination is for couples only – without trust, neither party will be able to fully enjoy being dominated.
If you and your partner want to engage in some domination play, then heed the advice below.
Start slowly
If dominating your spouse is one of your fantasies, then broach the topic carefully and ease your way in. What I mean is, start with some light domination, such as tying her up, the aforementioned blindfolding, or some light spanking. Save the latex and paddles for a few weeks down the road.
I went home with a guy who had an entire closet of domination toys… he thought it would be a good idea to show off his collection, and he quickly attempted to backtrack as I redressed and headed for the door. It’s a shame – he would have been a great lay, but he’d come on way too strong too fast. Even if you’ve been married for years, approaching the topic of domination should be done gradually and with sensitivity.
Take turns
Some couples prefer to always let the man be the dominator and the woman be the dominee, or vice versa, but for the most part, I think everyone has fantasies to be both. So take turns! Let her control you one night and then have a turn of your own the next time.
Speak up!
One of the most exciting parts of domination games is the vocalizing – ask her if she wants to be spanked, tell her what you’re going to do to her, ask her to tell you what she likes. If you’re busy pleasuring her while she’s wearing a blindfold and you’re both on mute, it won’t be very exciting. This is the time to choose your (dirty) words and get talking.
Playtime
Toys for the game of domination can range from fun and silly to extreme and hardcore. They all have their place in the bedroom when introduced in the right way. These are the types of toys you should pick out together. I love going to a sex shop with a guy – it’s like foreplay. Secondly, you don’t want to bring home a spiked collar and leash when your wife had more of a feather tickler in mind – seek out toys that you are both comfortable with. Finally, never surprise your other half with a sex toy – an unexpected whip-lashing on the bottom will not be well-received.
MWAH!
Gabrielle Moore
P.S. DON’T FORGET TO LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS BELOW! (If you’re shy, feel free to use a nickname)
