Archive for September, 2009
FOUR Reasons to Engage in Sexual Role-Playing
When you first started dating your girlfriend, you were smitten by her. Maybe she fell for you right away, or maybe you had to convince her to give you a chance; but either way here you are – still together. While “still together” is a good thing, it is not without its challenges. The first time that you were intimate with each other you may have been nervous, or you may have been very self-confident. However you felt inside, you were most likely doing your very best to project an image of being a Casanova. And look at that, you were already engaged in sexual role-playing.
Familiarity Breeds Boredom
Well guess what? So was your girlfriend. And for a time these new roles were exciting, and you looked forward to stepping into them every chance you could get. Think back as you discovered each other’s pleasures as your sexual roles became more and more familiar, and this familiarity was actually quite fine. Actually it was your anchor, and this gave you the confidence to keep exploring, because there were still so many new things about each other’s bodies that you had yet to discover. But over time you have done your exploration, and you are as familiar with her body as you are with your own.
As your sexual roles become second nature, somehow your sexual experiences may be losing a little of their edge or excitement. The nervous anticipation is gone, and along with it went some of the thrill and maybe even some of the playfulness of your sexual experience together. But you are in luck, because it is easy to recreate that wonderful sexual tension that you found when you first started having sex.
Role-
Playing Builds Intimate Bonds
Frequently the thought of role playing in your sex life conjures up visions of costumes and paraphernalia, and while that is certainly an option sexual role-play can be so much simpler than that. If you or your partner is self-conscious about role playing, then there is a good chance that you are also at least a little self conscious about having sex in the first place. Sexual role-playing can be a great way to build a bond with your partner, lose some inhibitions and have a great time doing it.
Having sex is the most private of moments and at the same time you are sharing it with your partner. Everyone brings their different inhibitions and preferences with them to the experience, so sexual role-playing is a way to pull that that sexual information out of the bag. It can also be a way to rip lose and indulge your most creative fantasies. The important thing about this experience is that you should be comfortable with the roles that you choose. You want to gradually stretch the bounds of your imagination, not shatter them.
Role-
Playing Helps Lose Sexual Inhibitions
If you are a little shy, or maybe even feel a little silly with role-playing in the bedroom, just start with something simple. For example, consider just reversing roles. If you are generally the more dominant lover, then let your partner take the lead. If you play the role well, you will have to be attentive to her cues and follow her lead. While it does not sound like much of a change, you will be surprised at how different your sexual experience will be.
Role-Playing Builds Confidence
Then as you each gain confidence in your role-playing abilities, branch out to other familiar scenarios. Remember that this is not your Emmy award winning acting debut; you are simply having fun with your partner in the bedroom. You are having a sexual adventure together. You adventure can be as basic or elaborate as you wish. You can simply make up situations and run with them, or you can introduce costumes, wigs and props into your adventure. You can literally be anyone that you want to be, and you will be surprised that the most ordinary situations become titillating when wrapped in a sexual undertone.
Four Ideas to Begin the Game
Here are some ideas for you to consider as both, you and your partner, decide where your sexual role-playing will take you.
• Boss and Employee – Role-playing is exciting when you are breaking the rules and being a little “naughty”. In the workplace there is a very clear line between boss and employee that can never be crossed, or can it? Well that is what you will discover in your role playing romp.
• Doctor and Patient – Another societal taboo is crossing the line in a doctor and patient relationship. A doctor is always supposed to be professional, but even doctors can only withstand so much temptation before something gives. After all they are only human you know.
• Professor and Student – Yet another one of society’s forbidden zones makes for an tantalizing adventure. In any of the forbidden combinations, the element of being discovered fills the air with sexual tension.
• Stripper and Customer – Along with social taboos are situations that are very one-sided making one partner practice restraint until the sexual tension is ready to literally explode. For example, whichever partner chooses to be the stripper will insist that the customer follow all of the “club” rules, and while you can look all you want, as the customer you may not touch. The stripper of course is absolutely allowed to touch, and you can take it from there.
There is no right or wrong subject, and you do not have to stay in character the whole time that you are having sex. Simply use sexual role-playing to keep the playful spark alive in your sex lives, and most of all remember to have fun!
For more SEXY and EROTIC ideas to enjoy the WILDEST SEX ever, click here!
How to… Spice Up Your Sex Life
Has the dreaded R word (routine) hit your bedroom big time? You’re not alone. Every day, millions of couples live next to each other, hardly ever bothering to get on top of each other. Put simply, as time passes by, sex goes lower and lower the list of priorities. And the nasty thing is, you may not even think that it’s a big deal. That is, not until THAT morning when you wake up, look over at your partner, and wonder why you are both living such a dull and boring sex life.
So to save you from the above scenario, read on and find out how to spice up your sex life.
Spice Tip #1. Build your stamina for sex.
First things first… are you fit for sex? As I’ve mentioned quite a couple of times before, it’s important to be fit if you really want to have sex often. If you’re not, sex becomes like a very hard chore. So instead of looking forward to glorious orgasms, you’re dreading the ‘effort’ required to engage in sex! Of course, apart from the great sex, you also get to reap all the wonderful benefits of being fit and healthy so why delay?
Spice Tip #2. Make time for sex.
Most of us lead very hectic lifestyles so I completely understand it when people tell me that they don’t have time for sex. However, when you take a moment to list down what you do spend time on and try to relate that to your relationship, it’s almost funny what we do to occupy our time!
For instance, someone once told me that they don’t ever have morning sex because he needs to run out the door right way to avoid traffic to work. I dug deeper and most of the time, this was a false sense of security anyway because he’s still always stuck in traffic!
So, as an experiment, I asked them to try morning sex for two weeks. No rushing out the door. And guess what, they discovered they can spend at least 30 minutes of cozy time before he really needs to leave for the day.
So, make a list of what occupies your day, your week, your month.
Beside each activity mark if it’s something that contributes to your relationship. If not, is it important enough that it’s ok if your relationship falters because of it?
This exercise should bring perspective into your claim that you don’t have time for great sex.
Spice Tip #3. Lead a sex-focused life.
When I mention this, people have the wrong notion that I mean handcuffs, bondage, or at the very least, tons of vibrators. Not true at all. You can be sex-focused without being a sex addict. Just make sex a priority by ensuring that you NEVER go a month without engaging in making love at least THRICE.
To encourage this, make small changes such as the following: re-decorate your room and give it a more adult and romantic theme; put a stash of adult literature in your bedroom; have a small – and locked! – box where you can place sex toys in; have a sex game you can easily grab and use; if you have kids, create a schedule where they spend weekends or even just a night with someone else; and so on.
Spice Tip #4. Master foreplay.
Here’s a secret: nearly all women complain that their lovers don’t engage in enough foreplay. So make another man’s weakness your strength. Know everything you can about foreplay and shock your lover at just how ‘attentive’ you can be.
Spice Tip #5. Aim to be a sex god.
After you master foreplay, great sex is definitely not far behind. You see, in reality, most couples engage in EXACTLY THE SAME sex moves and positions over and over again. You know what this tells me? Boring! So, keep enriching your arsenal of sex ideas, activities, and positions all the time!
For spicier sex tips to enjoy the WILDEST sex ever, click here!
Top 8 Ways to Keep Her Happy
You often hear that as time goes by, lovers/couples tend to take each other for granted, which often leads to the demise of the relationship. So, on your end, what can you do to ensure that you keep her happy? Read on and be confused no more.
Keep-Her-Happy Tip #1. Don’t pretend to be someone else.
It’s logical to ‘put your best foot forward’ during the courtship stage but be sure that she didn’t fall for someone completely different from who you really are. Remember that nothing can be sexier to women than a man who is relaxed and confident in his own skin. If you’ve already made the mistake of making her believe you’re different than who you are, then now’s the time to come clean. If you don’t, it would be near to impossible to keep her happy in the long run.
Keep-Her-Happy Tip #2. It’s true; it’s the little things that count.
When was the last time you brought her flowers? Most men think that to make their women happy, they need to splurge and give grand gifts. More often than not, you need only to buy her some flowers, or call her mid-day for no reason whatsoever, or buy her favorite candy, to make her completely happy.
Also, when was the last time you COMPLIMENTED her? A simply comment like “your hair looks great today” or “that blouse looks great on you” will keep her smiling all day.
Keep-Her-Happy Tip #3. Only have eyes for her.
Ok, I know that men like to look around at other women, but please do be cautious of your actions when you are with her. For you, this may be nothing at all but for her this is screaming “unfaithful!”. Women want partners they can trust and depend on… be that man by having eyes only for her when you go out.
Keep-Her-Happy Tip #4. Humor her!
Seriously, laughter is so UNDER-rated. Take some time to share a joke or two. It will make her happy and strengthen your bond.
Keep-Her-Happy Tip #5. Pick up a hobby you can do together.
When I mention this to other men, I get the classic roll of the eyes. However, there must be something you too like together. Otherwise, how did you ever get together in the first place?!? So, find some common hobby you can both engage in.
Keep-Her-Happy Tip #6. Take care of yourself.
Who says that it’s only women who ‘let go of themselves’ when they are in a relationship? Most men develop spare tires, annoying toilet habits and lose fashion sense along the way too. Here’s an exercise, take good look at yourself in the mirror. Compare this person to the guy she met when you started your relationship. How different are you now from that man? Be honest with your answer and see what you can and should do about it.
Keep-Her-Happy Tip #7. Get really acquainted with her friends and family.
You don’t need to fall in love with her family and circle of friends but you should at least show some effort in getting to know them. Your girlfriend/wife – and you for that matter –should not be put in a situation where she has to choose between them and you. It should feel like she’s adding you to her world. Besides, this can work in your favor too. During rough times, her family and friends can rally for YOU.
Keep-Her-Happy Tip #8. Keep things fresh and exciting!
Starting a relationship is always great because you have that giddy everything-is-new feeling. If you’re not careful, you and your partner can easily take things for granted, fall into a routine, and before you know it boredom is hitting you both hard! And this applies to inside and outside the bedroom.
As such, ensure that there’s always something new to experience and share. Take weekend trips to new places; continue taking dates, trying our different restaurants; and of course, explore your sexuality more and more by trying different positions, ‘accessories’, and so on.
Good luck!
For naughtier tips to enjoy the BEST RELATIONSHIP ever, click here!
