Archive for the ‘anal sex’ Category
Anal Play – Yes Or No?
“Regular sex will make your day, but anal sex will make your whole week.” – Unknown
Anal play – couples who haven’t tried it are mostly afraid of the unknown, and those who have done it (blush, me) love it (blush, me).
My motto is: don’t knock it till you try it. Until you’ve explored anal play in a comfortable environment, you might not know what you’re missing.
Anal sex has the potential to be as enjoyable, stimulating and satisfying as “conventional” sex – but it is something that requires patience, excitement, and a whole lotta lube! If anal play isn’t in your usual sexual repertoire, then you need to proceed with caution. Talk to your partner, work your way up to it, ease into things slowly, and make sure you communicate throughout. Once you experience back-door play, you’ll add a whole new form of erotic pleasure to your arsenal.
Yes to starting with your fingers
If you and your partner never engage in anal sex, then it may be best to work your way up to full-on penetration. So begin with a little rim action – use your fingers to lightly rub her anus in a circular motion. You can do this while you’re engaging in sex (doggy style), oral, or even during foreplay.
Then start by inserting one finger, and gradually work your way up to two. Make sure your fingers are well-lubed (saliva won’t do – it’s not a long-lasting lubricant, so make sure you’re stocked up with your favorite lube, like KY).
No to sudden movements
Nothing is more of a turn-off than an unpleasant surprise during sex, and anal sex is probably at the top of that list. Anal sex can be extremely painful if the receiver isn’t prepared, and if you’re hoping to start engaging in anal more often, then scaring or hurting her will be your one-way ticket to an anal-free marriage.
Before penetrating her, make sure she’s relaxed – that’s number one. Also, as mentioned, make sure your penis is good and lubed. Talk to her – ask her how she’s feeling, if it feels good, if she wants you inside of her. Gently let the tip of your penis touch her anus so she’s aware of what’s going on behind her. Slowly (verrry slowly) start to insert it and pay close attention to her physical reaction – if she tightens up, startles, or makes any sort of painful noises, withdraw. Her body language should be as fluid and rhythmic as yours if she’s enjoying it.
Yes to enjoying the sensations
Let yourself glide in and out of her slowly and steadily. Avoid any initial rough thrusts. Allow yourselves to adjust to the new sensations and work your way up to stronger, harder movements.
No to anal, then vagina
A final word: Don’t ever go from anal sex back to inserting your penis into her vagina – you could pass bacteria on, so prepare for a back-door finale.
Bottoms up!
Gabrielle Moore
Backdoor Sex Myths Busted!
Backdoor sex or anal sex is one of the most misunderstood ways of making love. There are just so many negative things about it that a lot of couples don’t even want to try it. However, why not try everything at least once? You’ll never really know what you like until you go out there and explore. Furthermore, backdoor sex can be extremely pleasurable for you and your woman considering the tightness of the area. So, if you feel like going on an adventure tonight, read on as we explore – and bust – the following backdoor sex myths.
FOUR Backdoor Lovemaking Fallacies
One: Backdoor sex is ‘abnormal’.
In many cultures around the globe, anal lovemaking is an accepted form of sex. Of course, in the end, no one should force one’s partner to do something the other is uncomfortable with. However, as I always advocate, don’t discount anything just because OTHERS say you shouldn’t do it. Keep an open mind; respect your partner; and try things at least one in your lifetime!
Two: Backdoor sex is painful.
Couples who engage in backdoor lovemaking swear that it hurts… you and your partner are probably not doing it right. When it comes to anal lovemaking, the following things are paramount: trust, relaxation, education, patience, and lubrication!
Trust is important because without it, your girlfriend/wife will be tense and subconsciously ‘tighten up’, which is the exact opposite of relaxing. Getting educated about proper techniques is also important to prevent any pain. Patience is also key because given the myths surrounding backdoor sex, it might take a while to fully convince your woman to try this sex position. And lastly, lubrication is a must when you try this. The anus is a very tight area and so the right kind and the right amount of lube is important.
Here’s a tip: try the Tongue & Thumb technique when starting your backdoor lovemaking voyage. This move calls for you to treat her to some great oral sex, which helps her get stimulated and lubricated. Next, reach down and press a thumb against her anus. The slight pressure is meant to further stimulate her as well as get her used to the feeling of something pushing on her behind. Vary the movement of your thumb from, say, drawing small circles to pressing down on her anus.
Three: Engaging in backdoor sex is ‘dirty’.
Considering what goes out of our backdoor, it’s easy to think of it as a ‘dirty place’. In fact, since childhood, aren’t we all taught by our parents to ALWAYS wash our hands thoroughly if we touch our behinds? However, if you and your woman practice excellent hygiene, this is not a problem whatsoever. The only thing you should keep in mind is that the anus – just like other parts of our bodies – has its own set of ‘resident bacteria’ so it’s best not to place anything from her backdoor to her vagina.
Four: Backdoor sex is only for gay people.
Sex is not gender-specific. Period. And yes, this includes backdoor lovemaking. This sex position is exactly that, another sex position and one should not look at it as something only practiced by a certain group of individuals.
In the end, trust and education are the real keys here. If your partner trusts you and believes that you respect her and that she’s the one in control of the situation, then the next step is to understand how best to go about trying backdoor lovemaking. From there, it’s all about experimenting and practicing… and when it comes to sex, that’s not exactly a bad thing, right?
For more AMAZING bedroom tips to spice up your sex lives, click here!
