The Game Of Domination
“Woman is the dominant sex. Men have to do all sorts of stuff to prove that they are worthy of woman’s attention.” – Camille Paglia
Domination can have a lot of meanings when it comes to game-play in the bedroom – it can be everything from blindfolding your partner to breaking out the whips, chains, and ball-gags. Almost all of my female friends agree (including moi): nothing is more of a turn-on than being dominated. It’s a primal urge that all of us seek to fulfill at some point in our sex lives, and when you’re involved with someone where trust is involved, it can be extremely exciting and satisfying.
Don’t take a woman home for a one-night stand and think you can get away with handcuffing her – trust me, she’ll be dialing “911″ faster than you can do up your pants! The game of domination is for couples only – without trust, neither party will be able to fully enjoy being dominated.
If you and your partner want to engage in some domination play, then heed the advice below.
Start slowly
If dominating your spouse is one of your fantasies, then broach the topic carefully and ease your way in. What I mean is, start with some light domination, such as tying her up, the aforementioned blindfolding, or some light spanking. Save the latex and paddles for a few weeks down the road.
I went home with a guy who had an entire closet of domination toys… he thought it would be a good idea to show off his collection, and he quickly attempted to backtrack as I redressed and headed for the door. It’s a shame – he would have been a great lay, but he’d come on way too strong too fast. Even if you’ve been married for years, approaching the topic of domination should be done gradually and with sensitivity.
Take turns
Some couples prefer to always let the man be the dominator and the woman be the dominee, or vice versa, but for the most part, I think everyone has fantasies to be both. So take turns! Let her control you one night and then have a turn of your own the next time.
Speak up!
One of the most exciting parts of domination games is the vocalizing – ask her if she wants to be spanked, tell her what you’re going to do to her, ask her to tell you what she likes. If you’re busy pleasuring her while she’s wearing a blindfold and you’re both on mute, it won’t be very exciting. This is the time to choose your (dirty) words and get talking.
Playtime
Toys for the game of domination can range from fun and silly to extreme and hardcore. They all have their place in the bedroom when introduced in the right way. These are the types of toys you should pick out together. I love going to a sex shop with a guy – it’s like foreplay. Secondly, you don’t want to bring home a spiked collar and leash when your wife had more of a feather tickler in mind – seek out toys that you are both comfortable with. Finally, never surprise your other half with a sex toy – an unexpected whip-lashing on the bottom will not be well-received.
MWAH!
Gabrielle Moore
P.S. DON’T FORGET TO LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS BELOW! (If you’re shy, feel free to use a nickname)
louis klugh
Says:
My wife unexpectedly cracked me on my naked posterior with a heavy belt, much harder than she had intended, as I came into the living room after a shower one day and I guarantee you that it was well received, especially after I looked down and saw that I resembled a horny 16 year old teen aged boy.
Bogdan
Says:
One time while I was still living in NYC, I had to bring someone a prop that they needed for their off roadway play. The prop was a whip. I rode the subway across town and you wouldn’t believe the sensuous stares I got from a LOT of different women along the way, lol
HappyGuy
Says:
Gabrielle,
The Female Orgasm Revealed is fantastic – “don’t stop Baby!” which what my girlfriend says!! Whoo-hoo!
I wanted to tell you that your comments on the subject of domination are spot on! Especially the comments about going slow and taking turns. I have a couple of additional suggestions: 1) trust is absolutely crucial and to help ensure that I like to give her an absolute “emergency” release word and this must be used immediately; 2) I also suggest that there be a way for an individual to be able to release themselves. The latter is for personal safety should their partner have an emergency medical issue – this could simply be a release or a cell phone in reach.
I know that some people will reject the above on the basis that it ruins the “effect” but I believe that trust is communicated best when your partner feels safe.
Good stuff, darlin’ – stay with it!
titep
Says:
its something i like as well, but i like to be fore-warned of what my partner is going 2 be doing. its really not nice especially with something like a handcuff and chain. (that happened to me very early in a previous relationship)
memon
Says:
i am male 32 year old please tel me delay time pill on karachi pakistan avelible harbale pill
smith
Says:
thank u gab u r genius. Ur mind blowing tips r working with my girl friend.
christine
Says:
so intresting i think its true en so intresting if both parties took turn in the domination
AKORA
Says:
the game of domination if done as you have revealed is quite amazing! keep that spirit of helping the couples to reach their orgasm at the right time of the game.
Fanie
Says:
Wow!!!! All above is just horrifying in a good way!!! Keep up the good work
Josh Giffard
Says:
Greetings, good article to get the mainstream public involved in dominant/submissive games that people play!
In my lifetime, I have been on both sides of the whip, I have been hit with the crop, 15 years ago, and I have been only dominant for the last eight years, so I have used the crop, or the cane and yes even a bullwhip, well mine was actually an Australian Dog whip
and it was only four feet long, but the shorter the whip, the more accurate you are with it, and I prefer great accuracy. Just like with a gunslinger from the old wild west, the object was to be able to hit what you are aiming at consistently. Or the question, how do you get to Carnaby Hall, answer is “Practice, Practice, and yes more practice” I wanted to be able to hit what I was aiming at 90 times out of 100, and when I got really good, my target was a golf ball, if you can hit a golf ball sized target at five feet, 9 times out of 10 you are pretty good at throwing a whip, but you have to be, because the one time you miss you can cause damage. Also its best to get diagrams of the human body showing you where you can and where you cant or shouldn’t strike, you dont want to willfully cause damage to the neck, spinal cord, kidneys, and be extra careful and not your full strength strokes when you aim at the groin area or your pets breasts or nipples, I wouldnt recommend using a whip, but a flogger is acceptable, but again not full force.
The “submissive” is always in charge, the dominant thinks he/she is in charge but in reality the submissive is always in charge, if your pet isnt feeling his or her best than it probably is not a good idea to play today. The idea is to be on top of your game, when you play. The well being of your submissive is more important than any playing you may or may not get to do today!
Remember if the “Cops” are ever called, even if you have a signed declaration from your “submissive” that he or she wants you to beat her or him /them with a crop, cane or whip, legally that declaration is not binding at all and isnt worth the paper its written on. Almost 100% of the time the Dominant goes to jail! If charges are made, it gets messy, assault at the minimum, if you are also restrained it could be held against your will or even kidnapping.
I have been going to both public and private play parties for over 15 years and the cops have never been called. At the big public play-parties, there were what is known as “Dungeon Masters” either male or female, that are the law or monitors or bouncers at a play party, if they ask you to stop what you are doing, you stop, if you dont you are kicked out of the party and usually not invited back to any party within the group. Pretty serious consequences for not obeying a dungeon master at a party. But you have to understand the dungeon master has the safety of all the people/participants at the function as their responsibility!
Basically your typical stoplight system for safety,
Green – means go faster or harder, I can take more.
Yellow – I need a break, or do something else.
Red – All Stop, Play Time is over, stops for ever today!
When you get more experienced some of us will add an orange in between yellow and red, yellow would mean stop doing what you are doing and do something else, Orange would mean, I need a time out of ten minutes or so, then we can go back to playing.
The old slogans work pretty well,
Safe, Sane, Consentual
The safety of your submissive is most important!
You both are Sane. Predictable behavior. Sane behavior.
Consentual – Your submissive has consented to this ordeal, this wonderful play party, this excursion into fantasy!
Safety first, last and always!
Be Responsible always, never play drunk, under the influence of any drugs, yes that includes alcohol, or play when you are angry! Accidents happen when you are either under the influence or angry!
Always be Responsible, you have the welfare of your partner/submissive in your hands!
babu prasad
Says:
Domination of one partner by the other is misplaced as far as the bedroom action is concerned. Since both of them want pleasure and orgasm in their own ways, the question of domination doesn’t arise. Male and female orgasms are not hundred percent alike. One needs the other to effect it. So the question of domination is out of the question. Even though I am a male, I for one feel that females are sexually stronger and better endowed than males. Some males may disagree. The female body is full of erogenous zones. Aren’t males falling for that, aren’t males being tempted by female sexual apparatus? So who is trapping whom? If males think they are members of the sterner sex, they shouldn’t fall for the female bodily temptations. But most males do. Males have only one sexual apparatus, that is their penis, i.e. the erect penis. Females have three known erectile parts, two nipples and the clitoris. So who is dominating whom? I feel the females dominate the males. But males are physically stronger but females are sexually much stronger for they are capable of two or three types of orgasms and are capable of multiple orgasms, whereas most men can’t orgasm more than once at each sex act. Some are capable of vaginal orgasm, others clitoral orgasm, and still others G-spot orgasm or a combination of all the three types of orgasm. Men may slap or spank them but women have the strength to endure and/or enjoy it. In spite of multiple orgasms, most of the sex toys are for females. That means they are capable of enjoying sex more and longer than men can. Girls attain puberty long before boys. Sadly girls become mothers long before a boy of the same age as the girl knows how to become a father.
matt wells
Says:
u have told me somethings i already know and a lot i didnt know u have been a great help most of the stuff u have sent me my women loves already it helps me get to know wat she wants even more then i already do i love to keep her thinking about what will b next thanks you have been helpfull
peter kiptoo
Says:
wow a great stuff it works out wonders that were underlying!
robert forget
Says:
Hello sexy. My lady is going to let me tie her up someday. Your right trust is the main point. We plan to wear old disposable clothes and tear at each other, while resisting he others efforts. What do you think?
preeti
Says:
i want sum male stripper who fuck me hard…so if u r having sum then plz send their contact no 2 my mail id….thanks a lot..i m eagar to do these position..
Dean
Says:
Been with my girlfriend less than 12 months so too early to get to this stage. plenty of give and take @ moment. I get fairly assertive if I wanna go down on her..which I do all the time, but don’t always push the issue. It’s kinda fun knocking down the no-go signs. My girlfriend on the other hand likes to play with my reversing camera. I know a lot of guys have an issue with this part of their anatomy, but I don’t. My body belongs to her in bed so I don’t fight it, I just let her do what she wants to do…